The Writing Garret

I love small spaces… which is hilarious, considering my size.
I don’t know if it’s the writer or the introvert or the sheer silliness of trying to collapse my bones and compress myself into the tiniest space possible, but I just find small spaces comfortable and safe.

Disclaimer: I’m not asking to be wedged into a hamper or anything… CARRIE…

Sidebar: Carrie is my shorter older sister.
She stuffed me in a hamper and sat on the lid.

We were children… unfortunately, I was adult size.

Despite my recent computer catastrophe, I had found reason for great rejoicing: I shall soon be the proud owner of a small writing garret!
In America, such things are called “studio apartments”, but we all know that a small room on the top floor of ANYTHING is a writer’s garret.
Let us call things by their proper names.

I have an excellent view of trees and grass, and thankfully NOT the local swimming pool, I have all the basic necessities, but most importantly, I have a deliciously tiny space in which to burrow… like a tall prairie dog.

I shall buy orange juice, and a french press and eat off of my china every day.
I shall sing loudly and speak only in Spanish or Shakespearean verse.
I shall only be seen by my neighbors wearing sunglasses and a small (but stylish) beret, carrying a cigarette holder with no cigarette (asthma, you know).

I shall be languid, and yet smoldering with intensity!

I shall buy a baby sloth and call him “Etienne of Navarre”!

I shall never answer my doorbell, and I will constantly be buying those stupid Glade plug-ins to fill my home with the scent of PURE VANILLA JOY!!!

I am well pleased.

Friday, I shall be sailing away to attend the wedding of one of my (many) cousins, so you most likely will not hear from me.
I may (or I may not… I am like the wind… I contain multitudes… I cannot be bound) recycle some of my older posts.
Either way, you shall most definitely hear from me on the Wednesday, the 23rd of October… from my garret.


4 thoughts on “The Writing Garret

  1. I am wildly jealous of your sloth. Not for being a sloth but for having a name like Etienne of Navarre.
    Of course, I do have a Dalek butler named Mycroft Poppins Dalek.

    I also love small places. I fondly remember my favorite studying/reading place in my high school library, which was a tiny corner between a bookshelf and a heater, barely big enough to cram myself into. Of course, I fit into small places well, except that I am always accompanied by a host of books, computer, teapot, teacups, and iPod, so not so well as you might think. But I wonder if there might not be something about introversion that likes a small enclosed space more than wide-open spaces. I feel so much more comfortable when I close my bedroom door, though I live alone and the rest of my house is tiny.

    Does this mean you’re going from having roommates to living alone? I can’t remember if you have roommates. I’ve been living alone for the first for the last two years, and I’m afraid I’ll never ever be able to readjust to living with people. It’s too delicious.


    1. The mental picture I have of Mycroft Poppins Dalek is hysterical… but I can’t draw, so I can’t share. My problem has always been that I have too many wonderful names, and to use them all, I would have to have either 200 pets or 200 children.

      I’m sharing an apartment with my mother (which I always say defensively, since people WILL assume that I’m mooching), which has been lovely, but the garret has opened up next door, and I couldn’t resist it. So, yes, I’m transitioning from “living with” to “living alone.”


      1. MPD is quite hysterical, actually. He composes epic poems, makes tea, shines silver, acts as a courier service, turns my kitchen into a war zone by cooking and making all the dishes dirty, and his best friend is a small stuffed rabbit called melo rabbit (no caps) whose hobby, job, and consuming passion is melodrama and living like a Victorian maiden in a ridiculous novel.
        (And he is named after Mycroft Poppins, not after Mycroft Holmes and Mary Poppins. But of course Mycroft Poppins is a hybrid of the two.)

        “My problem has always been that I have too many wonderful names, and to use them all, I would have to have either 200 pets or 200 children.”
        This is entirely true of me as well. When I was little, I planned on having 14 children and giving them all names like Alexander Maximilian and Josephine Ruby, and I had lists of hundreds of dog, cat, and horse names. One of my favorite horse names was Tricorder Readings.

        “So, yes, I’m transitioning from “living with” to “living alone.”
        I’m afraid you may like it terribly.


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